Tuesday

Tuesday, 25 December 2018 11:02 pm
apollymi: Trunks staring off in the middle distance, no text (DBZ**Trunks: Sentinel)
Well, we're home again. It's been a long, long day with a lot of driving... though thankfully less than the Louisiana trip. But it was still enough that I have managed to get all stiff and sore again. Luckily, Aunt Cathy gave me a few things that ought to help out with that: a personal-sized electric blanket and some heated seat covers for the car. Here's hoping anyway.

Monday??

Monday, 24 December 2018 10:20 pm
apollymi: Grumpy kitten, text translates to "the Kitten of Death has you in sight" (Kitten: Kätzchen des Todes)
Holidays always get me so confused. I actually have no idea what day it is anymore... and frankly, I’m a little ambivalent about it. It’s a day, and that’s that.

I did get to hang out with my Kaylee-bear , which is always nice. She’s just such a cool, calm kid that I can appreciate it. Jellybean just doesn’t seem to understand what any of us are saying when we say I’m too sore to play rough right now.

We’re doing lunch at Mum’s tomorrow, and then we’ll be heading back to the Atlanta area. At least, that’s the plan. We’ll see if that’s what happens.

Turnabout

Saturday, 25 August 2018 10:24 pm
apollymi: Vasquez firing his gun, no text (Mag7**Vasquez: Out of focus)
Wow, it feels like it’s been a busy day, and yet I’m not how much I’ve actually done. I got up a little later than I had intended, but I got [personal profile] katsuko dropped off and got on the road south. I ended up getting to Mum’s a little after 11 in the morning, after stopping around the halfway point for gas.

We did the food thing. Mum took me out shopping so she could get Grandmother a birthday present... and then she insisted on taking me shopping. [personal profile] katsuko, I saw a lot of stuff at Kohl’s that might appeal to us for around the house; we might want to stop by there sometime soon, before it’s gone. Then it was over to Cato’s for clothes: a new pair of leggings, a new dress, a vest, and two tops. Then back to the house to find out if Hayden would be joining us for dinner. He was going to hang out at a friend’s house, so no go. Funnily enough, Mike at House of China II still remembered me. More than that, she still remembered my old order, if that says anything about how often I used to go there.

Tomorrow’s going to be fairly busy as well, but mostly over at Grandmother’s. I’ll be leaving from there to come back home... or at least to pick up [personal profile] katsuko from work.

And that’s it. That’s all I’ve got. I’m going to lay in bed a little while and try to make some words happen. Good night, all.

Awake

Thursday, 16 August 2018 11:30 pm
apollymi: Quentin kissing a woman's hand, text points to woman and reads "fangirl" (DS**Quentin: Werewolf of choice)
I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to stay awake long enough to type this thing up. I've already fallen asleep on the edge of the couch a couple of times so far today.

One more work day this week, and then I will happily spend the weekend sleeping. It has just been such a long week, with these early mornings and late evenings.

Next weekend, I'm going down to Cuthbert to surprise Grandmother on her 80th birthday party. This weekend, though, is going to be dedicated to sleep. I can't think of any plans I might have.

And I'm still jolting my way in and out of sleep, so I think I'll hie myself off to bed. Just one more day. I can make it. I can do this.

Disappointment

Wednesday, 2 May 2018 09:29 pm
apollymi: Blank background, text reads "Some days the body count will exceed your word count. And that's okay" (Text: Body count vs. word count)
I apparently managed to dream up typing an entire journal of some length. I'm not sure how I feel about that. I'm certainly not going to try to replicate it, because I'm not sure I remember even half of the content of it... and that's mainly because I'm freaking exhausted.

And because I'm out of fucks to give.

I mean, why give a fuck about work? I hate it.
Why give a fuck about the house? I hate it too.
Why give a fuck about trying to dig myself out of a funk? It'll be years before I can financially afford to enjoy myself.
Why give a fuck about trying to lose weight? I'll just be fat and ugly and in pain anyway.
Why give a fuck about writing? No one gives a damn, no one enjoys it, and it's never done a thing for me.
Why give a fuck about dealing with my depression? I'll just feel alone at the end of the day anyway.
Why give a fuck about breathing? No one gives a shit anyway, and they'd be better off without me draining them.

So yeah

Saturday, 10 March 2018 10:38 pm
apollymi: Stitch with a cape and a swimsuit top on his head, text reads "I'm the goddamn Batman" (L&S**Stitch: I am the goddamn Batman)
Mum and Charlie got here around 8:30 this morning, and we all got over to the storage building by 8:45. And we were finished by 9:30 in the morning. We were all honestly planning on it taking a lot longer, but it wasn't nearly as bad as we were all thinking. I was hoping the four of us could have a nice lunch before they left town, but Charlie wanted to have lunch in Columbus, so they actually got back on the road instead. I got a text from Mum around 3:30 with a photo of all my stuff safely tucked away in the yellow house (aka my aunt's storage).

Mum is also letting me borrow Grandmother's car until I can get up a down payment on a car or Betsy is ready to get the Malibu. Knowing my luck, the latter will happen before I'm ready with the former.

So, yeah, I guess I'm back around to pimping the fundraiser. It's not my ideal way to try to deal with the issue, but it's going to have to do, because I am all out of fresh or helpful ideas.

To top it all off, I've had a pretty nasty ass headache since around Thursday, and it just got worse throughout today. So I've taken my migraine medicine for the first time in forever to see if it'll help me feel better tomorrow. Here's hoping.

And I guess I'm now gonna go throw myself at my bed, in the hopes that I'll feel better tomorrow. Later, all.

So damn tired

Wednesday, 7 March 2018 11:03 pm
apollymi: Draco & Slytherin company, text reads "Real friends help you crucio the witnesses" (HP**Draco: Real friends)
I am seriously a hair's breadth from just collapsing where I sit on the couch and not moving against for another month or so. I'm tired, my feet hurt, and I'm seriously one shaky little girl. I'm not sure what to make it of it, really.

I should be taking the time to type up all that I handwrote today, but I think I'm going to go straight to bed once I get this finished, but I've just got to make it that long. Getting this entry typed up is taking a lot longer than I thought it would.

So, I got approved for an auto loan at one of the three dealerships I've been talking to... so long as I can get up $1500 cash down payment. The place I'm approved at has one of the cars I like the look of best: a 2016 Nissan Versa 1.6 S 5M. It's not the one I want most (that would be this one), but it looks like a good, solid car that would last me a long while.

That said, it looks like Mum and Charlie (aka, Big Daddy Grumpy Bear) are coming Saturday to help me and [personal profile] katsuko clean out the storage locker, so that we can quit paying the $70 a month for it. Now if I can just find some other places to trim down money we're spending... Because car will mean that we're pretty much going to be living like paupers until either the car is paid off or we win the lottery... which would require we start paying the lottery.

And yeah, I got nothing. I need sleep, and I'm hoping I can go make that happen. Later.

Headache

Sunday, 28 January 2018 09:43 pm
apollymi: Stitch holding his head in pain, no text (L&S**Stitch: Headache)
I've got a pounder of a headache going, so this is probably going to be a very, very quick journal entry. I'm feeling a bit like a stiffened corpsicle, if that makes any sense, but there's nothing for it. I really can't afford to call out of work sick, not really, not when I'm not too sick, just extremely gross and sore feeling.

This week, I still have to make meals for a few more days yet. I have to go somewhere and buy baby shower presents for Anastasia from [personal profile] katsuko and me. I have to finish coordinating the baby shower for her as well. I have to survive the work week with Glynda. I have to do other things, I'm sure, that I can't even think of right now.

I heard from Mum today on Grandmother. She does seem to be much improved, which is some seriously fantastic news. They're thinking that, since it was caught in the first 24 hours, we might have forgone the worst parts of it. Of course, now we're crossing our fingers that Mum doesn't get it from being at the nursing home and around Grandmother. I'm also hopeful that my aunt and uncle don't get it either. Also, no updates on Betsy's stalker, but there are a lot of people working on it. One of the few small joys of a smaller town, where everyone knows everyone.

Seriously, I would love for this headache to go away. I'm not sure if it's because I've been fairly still and sedentary today, barring a trip to the grocery store, or if it's a migraine trying to come on, or what. I know it's not from a lack of caffeine, because I've been bad and had plenty of that. It could be from how little I've eaten today: some peanut butter, some pretzels, and some cheese. I just really haven't had the urge to eat today. It's a bit of a bad habit on mine on the weekends: I barely eat anything. I just rarely have the appetite for it most times.

And yeah, this was supposed to be a fairly short entry, wasn't it? I guess I kind of failed on that one. Oh well, at least I got most everything out here. I'm going to take a few minutes and get the handwritten story bits typed up, and then I'm going on to bed. Later, all.
apollymi: Kyo and Yuya with Kyo's sword, black background, no text (SDK**Kyo/Yuya: Still of the night)
I have slept away most of my day off work today. I mean, that's all right, because I guess I needed it or something, but it does make me wish for another long weekend, so I could feel like I didn't waste the whole thing on sleep.

I did spend a bit of time on the phone with Mum today. Grandmother got out of the nursing home yesterday, where she had been since Christmas, so that she would be able to heal from breaking her leg just before the holiday. However, today she had to be admitted to hospital because she developed the flu, with a light side of pneumonia. Apparently, the nursing home was like a quarantine zone when Mum picked her up yesterday: signs posted everywhere that there were flu cases there, only enter if necessary, absolutely no one under the age of 18 allowed in, etc.

Also, Betsy has developed a stalker. Apparently this guy is a brother of a friend or a friend of a friend. I'm not sure I really followed that entire part of the story. They dated for about two weeks, then she broke it off with him because he wouldn't stop drinking around her and Ava. At the time, it seemed amicable, and he quickly got a new girlfriend. But when they broke up, he fixated on Betsy pretty hard. He doesn't drive, but he kept turning up at the trailer park she lives in, apparently even trying to get into her house. Or succeeding; again, I'm not sure how well I was following that part of the story. She's moved trailers (within the same park), and he showed up during the moving. He told a friend of Mum's that Betsy is pregnant with his child and that he has a right to be there... never mind the fact that Betsy has had a hysterectomy done. Not sure what the plan going forward is there, but given that it's Betsy, I have no doubt it will be... interesting.

And yeah, I guess that all sounds fairly eventful, at least for a telephone conversation.

So that's been my day. I hope everyone else's was less eventful... or only eventful in good ways.

Very quickly

Sunday, 24 December 2017 11:58 pm
apollymi: Hotaru skipping happily, text reads "The Hotaru-verse is a shiny and fluffy place with skipping" (SDK**Hotaru: It's a skipping happy unive)
I took a Flexiril a little bit ago. I’m forcing myself into staying until I finish this entry. I don’t think that’s going to be very long at all now. This is going to be a short one by necessity. I'm too exhausted for much more.

I'm having way too much issue in typing up this extreme. Like I keep waking up a little bit and finding a few moments I don't know.

So, yeah, sleep now. Later, all.
apollymi: Scarlet Witch casting a hex, no text (Aveng**Scarlet Witch: Change the odds)
Owwwwww...

I hurt like I can’t even describe. Like my back is solid pain, my right ankle is screaming pain, my right wrist is nightmarish pain, and to top it all off, I keep getting random stabbing pain going through my right temple and behind my eye. I’m not even sure how to put that particular pain into words, other than “debilitating” and “sharp” and things of that nature. The worst one was while I was driving down, right before the turn off Highway 27 onto the road to go to Grandmother’s. I think I legitimately blacked out for a split second, because it was bad. It’s been better since then, but it was scary.

So I’m dosed up on Flexiril and the 800 milligram ibuprofen, to see if I can’t get the pain down to a manageable level before tomorrow starts. Otherwise, it’s going to be a small nightmare.

So I’m going to stop this entry now before that Flexiril kicks in and knocks me out. Later, all.

Accomplishment

Friday, 22 December 2017 11:29 pm
apollymi: Close up of Hicks' face, text reads "Save your life" (Aliens**Hicks: Save your life)
Okay, first things first: I need to make sure that our pantry and food stores never get as low as they were before today ever again. It took way too much money to get them completely restored. But they are indeed restored, which is a damn good thing. Lots of fresh veggies and protein heavy snacks and ingredients and such were procured as well.

I'm hoping for us to be on the road by 7:00 in the morning tomorrow. We'll see if that actually happens or not, but I'm damn sure going to try. (If not, I might blame traffic and say I did anyway.)

Oh my gods, I know it's break and the weekend and all, but shouldn't these children be in bed by now? It's nearly half gone eleven, and they're still up and running and yelling. They can't be older than five and eight. Shouldn't they be in bed by now? Or at least confined to inside? Do not like.

And yeah, I think that that's about all I've got to say for myself for today. Tomorrow, I'll be blogging from Grandmother's. Wish me luck.
apollymi: Close ups of Arthur and Eames, no text (Incep**Eames/Arthur: Dream bigger)
Yeah, whoops, you can tell I didn't have my computer with me over the holiday, to get the same subject line going on those entries as the regular ones. Whoops, oh well. I'm not sure I actually care that much, truth be told.

I am obviously back home again. I had a great time, but it was a vacation, visiting family. I'm back at home now, now that I can cuddle my kitties and hug [personal profile] katsuko. That makes it home. And that was stupidly sappy. Sorry about that. I guess even I can get a bit cheesy from time to time. Oh well. We'll all live, won't we?

Unfortunately, being home doesn't mean that I got a lot written for NaNoWriMo. I ended up being so tired from the drive and so sore from hiking yesterday that I just wanted a nap when I got home, which took away a lot of my time. We went to Qdoba and got a little bit more done, but then we came home and took another nap. I'm writing this from the future, as a matter of fact.

But Luci has finally forgiven me for going away. She's sitting in my lap and purring up a storm. Of course, that does include impressively dirty looks whenever I quit petting her, but nothing's perfect, right? She has also informed me, in no uncertain terms, that tummy scratches are not welcome and may result in rabbit kicks to the hand, as well as harder than nibbles biting.

I did stock us up on our good Still Pond Wine while I was down in South Georgia, so we're set there for a bit. I wish there was a place in Atlanta to get it, so that I didn't have to look like a lush every time I go to South Georgia and buy eight or more bottles. This is not the way I enjoy shopping for wine. I would prefer to buy one or two bottles at the time, maybe three tops if they're favorites. But when you can only get it in one place... I mean, I can order it online, yes, but the bottles are between $2 and $4 more online than they are at the BP in Cuthbert... and that's before shipping even comes into play. So, yeah, I guess I'll have to keep putting up with the "OMG, what a lush" looks to keep getting our good wine.

And yeah, I'm running out of things to say, so I guess I'll stop this here. I'm sure I could babble more, but there's no need to take up so much of people's friends list with my babble. Instead, I'll say good night, all, and go throw myself at my bed.
apollymi: Duo and Heero back to back, text reads "Together" (GW**Duo/Heero: Together)
It’s been a long and exhausting day today. Mom came over to Grandmother‘s house this morning, in part to help Grandmother with some of her bills and in part for the two of us to go hiking. We ended up hiking Providence Canyon (the Little Grand Canyon), which took about three or four hours start to finish —- and we only did the short trail! I ended up joining the Canyon Climbers Club, which means I have three more canyons in Georgia to climb before I get a free T-shirt. Probably not very exciting to most people, but I thought it was interesting and sounded like fun. It will be nice, I think, to have something to challenge myself with... aside from NaNoWriMo. Because that is not going well.

I want so much to be writing and be all caught up on my stories, but I’m not sure how or if that will end up happening. I’m so far behind, and there is still so far to go. I’m still not giving up yet, even though I probably should. I just don’t know how I can make up the number of words I need to by the 30th. Off the top of my head, I don’t know how many words behind I am, but it’s a lot. It’s a really lot. I might even say that it’s a hell of a lot. So I should give up, but I’m not going to. Not until the 30th.

I might try to see if [personal profile] katsuko would be interested in a miniature write-in when I get home tomorrow. See if we both can’t boost our word counts. If nothing else, we can sit in Qdoba or Panera Bread and try to make words happen. It may be a failed attempt. It might work perfectly. There’s no way to know until we try.

But I think now I’m going to try to get as many words as I can before I fall asleep. Wish me luck! And I’ll see everyone again tomorrow. Later, all!

NaNoWriMo - Day 23

Thursday, 23 November 2017 07:58 pm
apollymi: Faraday and Vasquez fighting back to back, no text (Mag7**Vasquez/Faraday: Back to back)
Well, This is a quick post from my Grandmother’s house. It’s been a long and eventful day. Honestly, I’m a bit exhausted, even if it’s a lot earlier than I am usually tired at. We pack a lot more into the day than I typically get into in Atlanta.

Apparently, tomorrow we are going hiking. I haven’t done that in a while and I’ve gained a lot of weight since the last time, so it will be an interesting experience. Even more interesting will be Hayden bringing his dog along for the walk and hike.

It’s a little hard to see how frail my grandmother is starting to become. She has never had the best health, but it seems like it’s declining further since my grandfather passed in 2004.

In other news, we watched the Dallas Cowboys embarrass themselves on national TV. I’ve never been a big Cowboys fan, so it was kind of enjoyable.

But that’s about all the news I think I have. I’m going to try to get some more writing done before I fall asleep. Later, all.
apollymi: Jean Grey as the Phoenix, surrounded in flames and smirking, no text (XMen**Phoenix: The bitch is back)
It's National Novel Writing Month Day 22. In a few hours, I'm heading down see the family for Thanksgiving. I'm not anticipating getting a lot of writing done while I'm there, but that's not going to stop from trying to tackle some little bits of writing.

What I am trying to do is get everything charged up and all before I leave. I know I can charge my iPad and my iPhone in the car, but there's no guarantee that I will remember that the second charger is even there until I'm in dire straights or something. I know me. I've seen me do things like that.

It's so dark and I'm so tired. All I want to do is sleep for approximately the next two years, but I don't foresee that getting to happen. So I'm going to cut this off here and try for a quick nap of a few hour before hit the road. I hope all my American folks have a good Thanksgiving holiday. Otherwise, later, all. Have a good one!
apollymi: Zack facing away, text reads "So don't judge me by my failures, only by my dreams" (FF7**Zack: Judge me only by my dreams)
Another less than productive day, at least on the writing front. [personal profile] katsuko and I did manage to get three weeks' worth of laundry done and my sheets cleaned at last, so that was a good thing. We even managed to get some of the shopping done, so that the cats won't kill us when they're out of food again. They were even out of dry food, which is pretty damn impressive, come to think of it.

The downside is that I feel like warmed over shite today. I've had a mild headache that's left me feeling almost disconnected from the world around me. I feel loopy, and everything has an almost dreamlike state to it. It has made concentrating to get anything done very, very difficult. I really hope I'm not coming down with something, that this is just a side effect of how weird my sleep has been as of late. I don't like being sick, but I especially don't want to be sick when I'm going to be opening at work every day this week. Granted, yes, it will be a short week, but still... That's beside the point.

And I especially don't want to be feeling any worse than normal, since I'll be going down to the family's for Thanksgiving and Mum's birthday. So hopefully some more sleep will fix the issue.

Luci is bug hunting. At least she will eat them most of the time. That's a good thing. One less bug to deal with and all.

But yeah, I got very little writing done today, which is a damn shame, because I intended to use today to be a catchup day, and that really didn't happen. So I'm going to have to make it up at some point. I just don't know when.

But for now, I'm going to try to get some sleep for my (blessedly short and Glynda-free) week at work. Good night, all.

Update

Wednesday, 25 October 2017 11:29 pm
apollymi: Scarlet Witch casting a hex, no text (Aveng**Scarlet Witch: Change the odds)
Mum talked Grandmother into visiting a therapist today, so that was a step in the right direction. That does seem to work very well for some people, so hopefully she'll be one of them. Talk therapy never really did a lot of me, mainly I think because I'm too self-conscious to ever really tell everything or say how I really feel about things. I can't do. I've tried talk therapy, but again, it really did nothing for me.

I do hope it helps Grandmother, though.

I said to Anastasia today that Grandfather was the rock that held our family together and it feels like it's unraveling a bit without him. There is some truth to that. And one of the things that Grandmother was so upset about was continuing to live in the same house the two of them lived in for nearly fifty years and seeing reminders of him everywhere. Betsy was actually talking about how Grandmother was so interested in an assisted living place in Stockbridge, up near here, and I don't know. Maybe that is a good idea. Maybe getting away from that area would be good for her. I'm not sure how well she would fare in the Atlanta area, but if anyone could adapt to that, I bet it would be her. It's Betsy I'm more worried about on that count. She is distinctly nervous about Atlanta highways and traffic.

But that's all speculation right now. Who knows what the future will bring. I'm trying not to let myself worry needlessly over any of this.

What I am going to do, however, is take my medicine and go the fuck to bed.

Dont know

Tuesday, 24 October 2017 08:52 pm
apollymi: Carl holding bottle of holy water, text from Monty Python & the Holy Grail (VH**Carl: Holy hand grenade)
I don't even know what to do or say here. My sister just had me call her so that she could share what happened this weekend with me.

Friday was the anniversary of Grandfather's death. Grandmother bought a gun and laid down in the bathtub and tried to shoot herself. She couldn't get the trigger to pull one handed, and that's when Aunt Cathy found her and knocked the gun away. She chose the bathtub so that it wouldn't be as much of a mess to clean up. Aunt Cathy and Uncle Tim even stayed with her all weekend.

The thing is, she even called me on Saturday. She couldn't remember what the other university in Tallahassee was and wanted to see if I knew. This would have been the day after all this happened, and she sounded fine.

I'm just... stunned. Speechless seems to be a good way to phrase it. If she had managed to go through with it, this would have been the second family member I've lost to suicide, given that Oyaji's brother hung himself about seven years ago this past May.

Mum's supposed to call me tomorrow to tell me about this happening, but Betsy wanted me to be forewarned. And now, as exhausted as I am, I'm not sure I can sleep. In fact, I'm sitting here watching [personal profile] katsuko sleep.

I just don't know. I don't know at all.

Irma

Saturday, 9 September 2017 11:26 pm
apollymi: Zack facing away, text reads "So don't judge me by my failures, only by my dreams" (FF7**Zack: Judge me only by my dreams)
This is going to be a really quick post, since I keep drifting off to sleep here on the couch instead of writing, like I should be. In fact, writing all weekend was my original intention, but that just didn't happen.

It didn't happen because so much of m attention has been on Hurricane Irma, trying to track its progress, trying to see where it's going and if it's still going to come near or through Atlanta. Right now, it looks like we're only going to get the outer edges of it, and that will still mean some pretty nasty wind and rain.

Still no news on if Georgia State will be closing for the weather. Almost all the counties around Metro Atlanta are closing their schools, including the universities. But the ones within Metro Atlanta are still waffling on the matter, including GSU. So who knows? I might have work on Monday. I might not. At least [personal profile] katsuko is off at IKEA, though that's because it's a regular day off for her, not for Irma.

And as I keep up with the news coming out of Florida, I have to sigh. At least Florida State has already closed and gone down to essential personnel only. If I was still there, I probably would have already packed up [personal profile] katsuko and the kitties and come to Grandmother's, but at least I would have known my job gives a damn about my life and safety. None of this "we're not closing for a little wind and rain" nonsense. For all my issues with it, I can at least say FSU gave a damn about its staff and students, and there are a lot of days where I honest to all the gods miss it.

But there's nothing to be done for that right now. What I am going to do is take myself to bed.

So long, my freaky darlings. Sleep well.