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Tuesday, 22 January 2019 09:08 pm
apollymi: Grumpy kitten, text translates to "the Kitten of Death has you in sight" (Kitten: Kätzchen des Todes)
Seriously, I could drop flat on my face and never move again. I'm tired. I hurt. I'm emotionally exhausted. I got paid on Friday, and I'm already broke, because damn it, bills are just about all we can afford to pay.

On the upshot, I do have a phone interview on Friday. Amusingly, I know two out of the three people I'll be phone interviewing with. Hell, two of them are in the same department as me, and one is the head of GSU Testing. The only one I don't know is the head of testing at GSU Alpharetta. I've been trying not to get my hopes up, but I applied for a job with GSU Testing Alpharetta. It would save me a huge amount of time, gas money, and wear and tear on the car if I'm driving 15 minutes to work instead of an hour and a half, you know?

I'm so sick and damn tired of people belittling the amount of pain I feel. I have Glynda, who complains every day about how sick she feels or how exhausted she feels or how her "bad shoulder" hurts. If my back or one of my legs decides to give out every so often, though, it's always "You're too young for that kind of pain" or "Well, you have an old mattress, so that's why you hurt". Bitch, no. The point is that no one knows why I hurt all the time. The point is that there are days I legitimately am only able to come to work because it's next to impossible to get time off. Like, I have 28 hours of vacation time, but over 80 of sick time.

And that's another rant that makes me miss Florida: we have to take the time the university is closed as off. There is no way to work during that time. However, we have two choices: we can either not be paid for that time or we can use our own vacation time for it. And I'm over here screaming, "What the fucking fuck?! Florida is supposed to be the broke state so far as how it pays its state workers, but it at least knows that, if you require a person to not be at work, don't make them pay for it! And yet, everyone here goes on like it's a great thing, because apparently, there used to be no choice: you just weren't paid for the time the universities were closed unless it was an actual holiday.

And then there's the whole thing where I regularly end up working a few more minutes over 40 hours on a regular basis nearly every week. If this time doesn't "mysteriously" get erased from the system, I don't get overtime for it. I don't even get comp time for it. If I don't somehow "lose" this time, I end up getting regular pay for it. And it doesn't stretch too far in Atlanta, even the suburbs.

Honestly, it's to the point where I'm thinking about taking another part-time job. I'm not sure where I would find the time -- or, more importantly, the energy -- for it, but there needs to be more steady money coming into this household. We can't count on [personal profile] katsuko's money being the same week to week, and all my insurance bills went up at the beginning of the year. I did get a 1% pay hike, but it was not enough to offset the insurance increase.

And that's my daily whinge. Goodnight.

002

Wednesday, 2 January 2019 10:05 pm
apollymi: Draco & Slytherin company, text reads "Real friends help you crucio the witnesses" (HP**Draco: Real friends)
Okay, I didn't get nearly as much done today as I meant to. I did do some writing. I got the tired changed on the car, since somehow we got a nail in one of them. We went to Walmart to get it, then they sent us to PepBoys to get the wheel lock broken, but it turned out that tire didn't have a wheel lock. So then we went back to Walmart, and we got the new tire put on. It overdrafted the account... but we can drive the car. Or [personal profile] katsuko can drive the car. Let's be realistic here. I don't get to drive my own car much.

Legit, though, today was an adventure, and I'm kinda glad it's over.

My poor Ripley

Saturday, 29 September 2018 10:47 pm
apollymi: Zack facing away, text reads "So don't judge me by my failures, only by my dreams" (FF7**Zack: Judge me only by my dreams)
I’ve spent most of the day backing up my computer, Ripley, to an external hard drive. It’s very slow going, obviously, but I feel like I’m almost in the home stretch. I have to finish backing up my videos and my applications, and then that’ll be pretty much everything. Unfortunately, from what I can tell, that’s going to take a couple of days to finish up, but I’ll still do what I can.

Right now, all of this is trying me hard. I hate that all of this is happening at once... but that does seem to be how my life goes a lot of times. All the issues, financial and otherwise, almost always seem to hit all at one time.

Part of me feels like I should cancel my vacation, but I so seldomly get to do stuff like that, especially with [personal profile] katsuko, that I don’t want to. Like I said, the last “real” vacation we took was to Saint Augustine in 2010. We deserve a few days away from Atlanta... right?

Before I start giving in to the urge to apply for jobs in Tallahassee again? I mean, more than I already am.

And, yeah, that’s all I have got to say for myself for today. Good night, all.

Rant ahead

Friday, 28 September 2018 10:18 pm
apollymi: Bakura and Kaiba fanart, pastel colors, text reads "Jealous yet?" (YGO**Bakura/Kaiba: Jealous yet?)
I’m just gonna sit here and bang my head against the wall.

Next month is going to be the first real vacation @katsuko1978 and I have taken together since 2010, when we spent 3 days together in Saint Augustine, FL. (By “real vacation”, I mean a relaxing trip where we leave the city we currently live in and do the cheapest, cheesiest touristy things.) We’re actually only getting to take this one because we’re staying with @mistmarauder instead of getting a hotel.

I’m in the middle of getting oral surgery to take out a bunch of broken teeth, because paying for the dentist hasn’t been in the budget. Once we pay the parts my (crappy Georgia Board of Regents) dental insurance won’t handle, it’s going to be nearly $5000.

I’m slowly paying my Mum back for the loan towards replacing my car. I’m trying to save money to help @katsuko1978 buy a scooter, so that we have two vehicles, especially when we work in different cities. I’m trying to pay off the parts of my surgery to remove uterine fibroids (back in December 2017) that the (crappy Georgia Board of Regents) medical insurance wouldn’t cover. I’m trying to pay off various bills that have gone into collections.

...

...

So of course right now is when my laptop decides it’s time to start dying. I have been trying to make it last until I get my tax return next year, but now I’m starting to worry. I’ve been used to the trackpad not working; it’s been iffy since Roo sat on it many years ago. I’ve been used to the speakers not being the best and crackling when I play any sounds; I got a cheap external speaker to handle the problem.

But then the screen started losing liquid crystals about a year ago, leaving me with one corner of the screen completely black. Okay, I said, it’s just a small spot.

But then half the screen suddenly lost part of its brightness. It’s not completely gone, but one of half of the screen is still as bright as normal and the other half is constantly about half as bright as that. It wasn’t easy, but I could still see enough of it to write. When I couldn’t see something well enough, I mirrored the screen onto the TV.

But then two weeks ago, a small piece of plastic broke off the housing right below the trackpad. Well, it’s nearly ten years old, I said to myself; losing a little plastic here and there is expected.

And now tonight, a second piece of plastic popped off below the trackpad, and now it’s popped up and mostly detached from the rest of the laptop. I have to run a small fan on the side to keep it a little cooler. I’m slowly working on backing everything up to an external hard drive and Dropbox.

Because I damn sure cannot afford a new $1300 laptop. Hell, right now, I can’t afford a $1100 Apple refurbished one. No, let’s go one step further than that: I can’t even afford a $600 refurbished one from Mac of All Trades.

Something’s got to give here. At this rate, it might just be me.

Bleh, Monday

Monday, 17 September 2018 10:08 pm
apollymi: Zack looking confused, text reads "WTF?" (FF7**Zack: WTF?)
Well, I made it through the work day. I didn't have to maim or kill anyone... but it came close. So many little nitpicky rules that they're suddenly deciding they want to enforce... and then cop attitudes, saying shit like "Well, these rules have always been there" and "I don't know about your old district manager, but I've always required these be done" and so forth. It's some terribly frustrating shit.

Also incredibly frustrating: I got a bill back from my dental insurance, saying they don't pay for temporary bridges, so hock up the $1400 I now owe them. Like, wtf? WTF? Why do I pay all this money to you guys then?

And, yeah, that's it. I'm still running only because of rage and spite, and I have reached the limits of how far they will carry me. Good night, all.

Monday

Monday, 6 August 2018 11:25 pm
apollymi: Doujinshi art of Sirius Black, no text (HP**Sirius: Do not approve)
Yeah, it was a Monday. It was one hell of a Monday, because Glynda was in a right damn mood... and Richard was in a right damn mood... and it ended up being right at 5:15 when LaTrease told Anastasia and me to pack up and leave (before we get even more overtime built up)... and I didn't make it to the gym again today... and just everything else.

I did, however, manage to get my first actual appointment with my new dentist, even if it's not until September. I can deal with that. I think it's just going to be a cleaning and fitting me for my temporary dentures. That way, when I go back for my big oral surgery (12 damn extractions!), I'll have teeth to chew with immediately afterwards. That will be a good thing. I'm hoping we can spread some of this out over a few months, so that I have time to reacquire money in between, but we'll take it one day at a time.

Anyway, it's past time for me to go to bed. I'm going to give that a try, see if I can't make myself sleep, no matter that I'm still not particularly feeling tired.

So long, my freaky darlings!
apollymi: Steve & Danny hugging, text reads "Stop breaking my fucking heart" (H50**Steve/Danny: Stop breaking my ❤)
Well, I did the dentist thing this morning. I do have to say that it was most a consultation… one that involved a lot of X-Rays and such being taken, including one of my whole damn head. Apparently, this is going to involve less work than Mum feared but a whole lot more than I was anticipating. I will need to have oral surgery to remove 12 impacted or broken teeth, several of which have some level of infection around them. After that, I’ll need to get a temporary partial denture. Once my mouth has healed some from that, I’ll get a permanent partial denture. After my mouth has healed some from that, I’ll have to get at least four cavities filled and one root canal with a crown.

Now supposedly, my insurance will cover a large portion of this. The out of pocket expense for me, though, is going to be $2700 up to the partial denture part of that. I might have to wait until the next insurance year starts to get the rest of this done, because otherwise, it’s going to be all out of pocket. A good half of the ones I’m looking at now will be out of pocket, because my annual maximum is $1500. (Yes, my dental insurance literally has a maximum I can spend. WTF?)

Other than that, it’s been a relatively quiet day. I’m not sure what else to say. That’s been my sticker shock going on all day.

Anyway, I’m going to go throw myself at my bed and hope for sleep. If not sleep, then at least do some more writing. I’m not going to hit my goal of 2,000 words tonight, but maybe I can get a bit closer to being caught up. Either way, good night, all.
apollymi: Hicks training Ripley w/weapons, Ripley looking over shoulder at him, text reads "You started this. Show me everything" (Aliens**Hicks/Ripley: Show me everything)
Ugh, more fireworks, still ongoing. I do not like. I’m really very, very ready for them to be over and done with, and yet they keep on going. It’s like some demented, evil Energizer bunny or something.

I seriously think Anastasia’s going to end up calling the dentist for me at this rate. I’ve been putting in messages to various dentists with Saturday hours, trying to find one that can see me as soon as possible. But so far, no joy yet. I’m not giving up yet, though.

I’m so tired and I hurt so much and sleeping is so hard when I hurt so much. I’m going to be glad for the weekend. I just hope tomorrow goes better at work than today did. Everything updated, with new logins and passwords… and no one saw fit to let us know ahead of time. Then five computers had to be reimaged and pretty much virtually rebuilt from scratch. It ended up taking the better part of a day.

So I guess I had best admit to defeat on writing tonight and try to get some sleep. Good night, all.
apollymi: Newt, Hicks, & Ripley checking blueprints, text reads "Family" (Aliens**Hicks/Ripley+Newt: Family 2)
Ugh, I hate Fourth of July. The kitties hate Fourth of July. All the puppies hate Fourth of July. It is just all around suck, if you’re not into shooting off fireworks and the like. Given the headache I’ve been rocking (thanks to the toothache), I am not into the shooting off of fireworks right now. I am into the peace and quiet right now, and that’s not happening. Not until at least around 1:00 or 2:00 this morning.

Tomorrow and Friday I have to open the office, so I have to be there at 7:15. That means I need to leave the house by 6:30, I think. Certainly not much later than that. Earlier might even be better, but ugh, early. I am not a fan of early, either. I much prefer my sleep, when I can get it. Which hasn’t been all that much lately, given the toothache from hell.

Let’s make matters even more fun. Not only I have the whole extra money coming out now with the car and car insurance, but my laptop is going downhill fast, and I can’t guarantee how much longer she’s going to last. Half the screen is faded to about half brightness, and the liquid crystals in the top right corner of the screen have faded to black. The dimness just started last night when I brought it up out of sleep mode, so I’m still trying to see if I can figure out a way to fix this latest issue or if it’s going to be an ongoing problem.

So not only is Ripley going downhill fast, but I also have to figure out how to swing the dentist visit, because dear gods, how that needs to happen. (I feel like this might be a good time to mention that my Dreamwidth has a link to donate on Paypal. Because right now? Right now I feel like I’m drowning, and there’s no way up to the surface.

So with all of this in mind, I’m going to try to make words happen, so that I can get up and go to work in the morning. Later, all.
apollymi: Trunks staring off in the middle distance, no text (DBZ**Trunks: Sentinel)
Blegh. I feel rough. The same couple of teeth are still throbbing like hell. I tried to make an appointment with the dentist Anastasia recommended, but they don't have any afternoon appointments and I have no idea when I'll be able to get in for a morning appointment. It's going to be interesting, that's for certain. It's amazing how difficult work makes life sometimes.

Writing has gone pretty all right today. Not as great as I was hoping, but right now, being in near constant pain does make concentrating a little difficult. In fact, truth be told, it makes writing difficult as hell. But I have banged these characters' heads together until they cooperated, and thus words have happened. Not as many as I want, but again, beggars can’t be choosers.

At least I have Wednesday off work. I think I’m going to spend the day on the couch, sans pants, and possibly not even move at all if I can help it. Yeah, that sounds damn good.

I’m ending the night with 1,728 words for the day and 3,411 out of 50,000. I am on schedule to complete on time.

Saturday

Saturday, 30 June 2018 10:26 pm
apollymi: Stitch holding his head in pain, no text (L&S**Stitch: Headache)
I took a Benedryl last night, trying to get the itching to die down even a little. I can't say for sure if it did or if it didn't, but I certainly slept through the entire night, only waking up around five or so to go to the toilet. The itching on my face has died down a bit, though the skin is still really kind of scaly and uncomfortable. Along my neck is better, but it's certainly not gone yet there. The hands are still pretty damn bad, and I'm not sure if that's thanks to the various cleaning chemicals I have to use at work or not.

The teeth, on the other hand, are a completely different story. There is constant, deep, throbbing pain there until I just want to scream and scream and scream... except the air hurts my teeth, so I can't do that. I've used enough Orajel on them that I think that's why I'm so dizzy, even if it's barely making a dent in the whole thing. The 800mg ibuprofen isn't doing a lot either, and that's a crying damn shame.

All in all, I'm going to have to gather my limited resources and try to get in to see a dentist sooner rather than later. Fun times.

Ugh

Tuesday, 19 June 2018 09:56 pm
apollymi: Sailor Moon, blue in the face, teary eyed, text reads "Epic whine" (BSSM**Usagi: Epic whine)
It's not even officially summer yet, and I feel like I'm already dying of the heat around here. I've even broken with pattern and cut on the air conditioning already this year. Now granted, I do believe [personal profile] katsuko and I might be having a wee disagreement about how cool is cool enough -- for me, it's got to be 75°F/23.9°C to breathe, much less sleep... but she prefers it up around 77°F/25°C. Honestly, I would love to push the temperature down to around 72°F/22.2 or so... and just have her put on a sweater or something, but there is one more small proviso that is keeping me from it.

Namely that's the fact that the power bill is already well overdue. I have to pay at least $50 on it on Friday to keep it from being disconnected, then there's still another $80-something due. Plus the $85 that needs to be paid to keep the internet running. But all of that is for another day. We'll deal with it when we can, after all.

And now, I'm going to try not to die of hot as I sleep. Good night, all.

Another Day

Wednesday, 13 June 2018 11:07 pm
apollymi: Ryou holding Thief King Bakura, text reads "Our Farewell" (YGO**Bakura/Ryou: Our Farewell)
Well, I guess I've made it through another day. I didn't get nearly as much writing done today as I wanted to. In fact, I just did one page, front and back, of handwriting. Mostly, I guess I just couldn't concentrate.

I did manage to sneak a few minutes online to check auto insurance rates, trying to see if anything was going to be cheaper a month than Progressive. GEICO is... but by about 75¢. Not enough to really worry about dealing with.

[personal profile] katsuko got her hair cut off again to deal withe ongoing issues of teal streaks.

And we've had sweet kitties every minute we've been home today.

I think that's about all I've got. This week has been ridiculously long, and I'm ready for it to be over, so it's of course dragging. Maybe some sleep will help with that. Later, all.

Things

Saturday, 9 June 2018 10:46 pm
apollymi: Giles holding a blue cup of tea, text reads "cuppa tea" (BtVS**Giles: Cuppa tea)
I got to have my lazy Saturday today. I did spend part of the day texting with Mum and conversing about cars, but that's as far as we got. I didn't even leave the house today. I kinda wish I could have more days like that. I like days where I don't even have to leave the house.

The only real drawback is that my teeth hurt. Like I said, Anastasia gave me a recommendation for a dentist, but I'm kind of waiting to see what her experience with getting her dental work done first is going to be before I commit to doing too much. Apparently, there are a whole lot of extra rules and regulations to my dental insurance that I'm not sure I can figure out. From what I can understand, I have to pay at least a $50 deductible before my coverage kicks in... but then it only covers a maximum of $1500 a year... and I imagine it's going to be a whole lot more than that for what all I need done.

If this dentist's rep is like Anastasia is telling me is, she'll try to find a way to minimize the amount of work done per insurance year. The way Anastasia was describing it, she's not the kind who wants to do a lot of extra work on a person just because she can. Sort of a "what can be done to get you up and running" kind of doctor, if that makes sense.

But that's it. I'm out of Nyquil, so I'm not sure how well the sleep thing is going to work. But I think I'm off to give it a try. Later, all.

owww

Sunday, 20 May 2018 10:34 pm
apollymi: Vasquez firing his gun, no text (Mag7**Vasquez: Out of focus)
Okay, dental pain is a pain in the ass. See me pun. But seriously, I've barely been able to bite down on anything. Or drink anything cold. Or breathe through my mouth. Or do much of anything because it will aggravate the throbbing teeth I've got going. Soft, warm food and hot drinks are about all I can handle. And that's a fucking pain in the ass.

I shouldn't be sitting here thinking about hurting another part of me so that I can focus on that hurting instead of the teeth, should I?

I feel like I need to plug the PayPal pool I've got going. I just need to get up a little bit more money before Saturday, so that I can at least try to contribute towards my own "new to me" car.

I'm slowly transitioning all my unfinished Magnificent Seven stories from Google Docs to Zoho Docs. So far, I've gotten up all of Ain't Our Time and all of Uncollared, as well as part of Resurrectionist. I'm going to try to work more on that tomorrow. I have no illusions that this won't be a multi-day project as well.

I've just about finished getting everything out of Bun Bun. Which means the next non-writing project is getting Shinigami cleaned out. And coming up with a name for New To Me car, which might have to wait until I see which car it is and how its personality is.

And yeah, that's all I've got. This is me trying to manage my stress by focusing on little things, instead of the shit that terrifies me (mostly money-related). We'll see how well it works.

Updates

Saturday, 19 May 2018 10:39 pm
apollymi: Split icon, top close-up of Ripley's face in color, bottom close-up of Hicks' face in b&w, no text (Aliens**Hicks/Ripley: Stares)
So... yeah... It turned out to be doubly good that Mum didn't come today. She is still sick so just puttering around the house today completely wore her out. And also, Charlie took her Murano for an oil change and they found a nail in her tire, so if she had come, she probably would have ended up with a flat tire somewhere along the way. So those are both very, very good reasons to be glad she didn't come.

But now I feel like I'm in overdrive. She said that she wants to go ahead and do the car shopping when she comes next weekend. In fact, she says that she should have $1000 set aside for a down payment by then. And I... have nothing. No money towards a down payment. No potential cars to look at. Hell, I don't even have my old car cleaned out yet.

So this is my plan. I've set up a PayPal money pool so that I can shameless beg for any little bit. [personal profile] desolate03 in particular said she would help me out. The little bit of money I got up before ended up having to go to rent when I didn't get enough up, and besides, what came through via GoFundMe, I lost 9% of it due to fees. I keep the most of the money through PayPal, sad as that is.

I'm going to take an empty storage tote out to Shinigami tomorrow and try to get him a little closer to cleaned out. I suspect it might end up taking a couple of trips, though, so hopefully the weather holds.

And then I'm just going to deal. I'm going to shut up and deal because that's all I can do.

Because, yeah, we've reached the point of having to deal with this a lot sooner than anticipated, thanks to Betsy's rather impressive wreck, but it's been coming. I've just got to deal with it.

Disappointment

Wednesday, 2 May 2018 09:29 pm
apollymi: Blank background, text reads "Some days the body count will exceed your word count. And that's okay" (Text: Body count vs. word count)
I apparently managed to dream up typing an entire journal of some length. I'm not sure how I feel about that. I'm certainly not going to try to replicate it, because I'm not sure I remember even half of the content of it... and that's mainly because I'm freaking exhausted.

And because I'm out of fucks to give.

I mean, why give a fuck about work? I hate it.
Why give a fuck about the house? I hate it too.
Why give a fuck about trying to dig myself out of a funk? It'll be years before I can financially afford to enjoy myself.
Why give a fuck about trying to lose weight? I'll just be fat and ugly and in pain anyway.
Why give a fuck about writing? No one gives a damn, no one enjoys it, and it's never done a thing for me.
Why give a fuck about dealing with my depression? I'll just feel alone at the end of the day anyway.
Why give a fuck about breathing? No one gives a shit anyway, and they'd be better off without me draining them.

So... close...

Monday, 30 April 2018 11:44 pm
apollymi: Jean Grey as the Phoenix, surrounded in flames and smirking, no text (XMen**Phoenix: The bitch is back)
I am so freaking close to being done with Camp for the month. It seems like this one has been harder on me than previous WriMos... but I think I say that every time. I've had a lot more days where I end up writing nonsense because my words are broken. I think yesterday's journal entry might have fit that bill, and I know I ended up rewriting the same 400 or so words a good three or four times yesterday, because they made progressively less sense the further I went. (In fact, I ended up having to fix a lot of it on the train today, because really, it made no sense at all.)

Another of my teeth broke a bit more. It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't one of my front teeth, and now it's embarrassing. But I was playing on the dental insurance website, and even though they cover 80% of the cost, getting dentures would still be a whole lot of money. Not as much as implants, apparently, but still a lot.

I'm just tired of being in pain and looking terrible. That starts with my teeth and goes to my weight and then on to the fibromyalgia and everything else. I'm just tired. I'm just tired of everything.

Anyway, wholly depressing thoughts aside, I'm going to try to get the last few hundred words done, so I can go throw myself at my bed. Good night, all.

Ugh

Wednesday, 18 April 2018 10:58 pm
apollymi: Stitch holding his head in pain, no text (L&S**Stitch: Headache)
I think that might be one of my most commonly used subject lines, but it's apt today. I was absolutely right about pushing my leg too far yesterday, and it's spent the day letting me know about it. That ankle, in particular, has been throwing some pretty epic fits at me too. It hasn't like me walking on it or turning corners on it... or well, obviously, doing much of anything.

But I think the headache is the worst part here. It started somewhere before lunch time, and it has barely eased up in the least since then.It's just been a sharp, constant pain that I can't seem to get rid of. It's not quite unbearable, but it's definitely not letting me forget that it's there. It's also not responding to anything I take for it, and I'm a little leery to try taking too much else. I've had four Excedrin migraine and a 800mg ibuprofen since I left work, and I still have to take my regular nighttime pills: the Paxil and my Plaquenil.

Friday afternoon can't get here soon enough, so that I can take my contacts out, put on my comfy clothes, and not have to do anything until whenever. At least until my headache eases up. But at the same time, I know myself better than that. I still need to go pick up a new pair of jeans, because money ran out before I could on the last check.

And yeah, once I get my word count for the day, I'm going to go collapse in my bed and not move until it's time for me to get back up and go to work.

And that's it for me for now. Later, all.

Day 2

Saturday, 7 April 2018 11:20 pm
apollymi: Quentin Collins on a dark green background, one eyebrow raised, no text (DS**Quentin: Oh really? (eyebrows))
Oh my gods. I hurt. I hurt so much. I know people always say that the day after an injury is worse than when it initially happens... and it's true. It's so true. I feel like I've been beaten with a stick... and then someone came back with a car for round two.

Let's top that off with the fact that I'm so sore right now that I'm barely able to feel any kind of ability to walk at more than a snail's pace. And since I did leave the house and struggle enough to go get our few groceries for the week... as well as some snacks. Granted, I do seem to end up regretting every motion so very, very much.

My right leg is just solid pain on a nearly permanent basis, instead of just the knee, heel, and ankle that usually make up the daily pain there. Not to say that those don't hurt, because that would be a damn lie. Those all hurt -- and worse than ever -- but they also hurt worse than they have in days, maybe even longer. They're just joined with a small host of other aches and pains: the entirety of that leg, my back and shoulders, and then a lot of various other places that come and go, like my right arm and left shoulder.

I'm running a constant headache that seems to alternate where it's located just slightly, depending on the day. Sometimes it's right between my eyebrows, sometimes it's directly behind my eyeball, and sometimes it's just the whole head. I think I dislike the one between the eyebrows most, because it's a sign that I've been holding myself too tightly and I'm about to collapse again and, if I want to have a bed beneath me, I need to move as quickly as I'm able.

I'm moving about as quickly as someone twice my age, though, which is even more spectacular. Stairs are a fucking nightmare. I found that one out today, because there are two sets of stairs leaving the apartment. Let's just add in the fact that I can barely bend my right knee and putting too much weight on that ankle is even worse, and suffice it to say that I'm going to be losing speed races at the nursing home, as well as anywhere else.

So, yeah, that's where I'm at right now. Tomorrow, I'm going to have to face those steps again to go with [personal profile] katsuko to pick up a shirt at Goodwill for her work. Apparently, she needs a polo shirt -- no preference on color or anything, so long as it's free of designs -- to wear on new/old job. She has no money, so I'm gonna use some of what I have left towards that. I might splurge and buy myself a pretty shirt if I find one too. We'll have to see on that front.

Anyway, later, all.