Not sure

Friday, 26 May 2017 11:17 pm
apollymi: Steve & Danny on couch, text reads "It is what it is" (H50**Steve/Danny: It is what it is)
I'm not sure that I really have anything much to say. I'm tired. I'm tired almost beyond meaning of the word, but I need to get some more words done, because I won't really be able to write tomorrow, since I'll be at Mum's and Grandmother's for a very belated Mother's Day.

I still feel like I need to apologize to any potential readers and my characters for what I've been writing and editing the last couple of days. I swear, I only do it out of love.

And now I guess I need to go the fuck to bed, so that I can maybe get a little sleep, so that maybe I can get up at a good time to get on the road. I'm hoping to leave between 6 and 8 tomorrow, after all, so that I can spend plenty of time visiting.

Anyway, I'm going to try to finish up a bit more of this scene, so that I can maybe go do that sleep thing. Later, all.

Apologies

Thursday, 25 May 2017 11:26 pm
apollymi: Yami no Bakura on a stripy background, text reads "Evil (crossed out 'looks like') IS a gay Japanese schoolboy" (YGO**Bakura: The face of evil)
Oh gods, I think I need to apologize to the world for what I spent the day writing. I'm not sure if it was necessary to write out a scene that probably will never appear in the [community profile] 15kinks story to begin with, but my brain insisted that it was necessary for backstory purposes, to show (part of) why Goodnight is so fucked up in that story.

And yeah, that's about it. I've got nothing else.

My most sincere apologies, world, and good night.

Another fail

Wednesday, 24 May 2017 09:47 pm
apollymi: Trunks just after landing a punch, no text (DBZ**Trunks: Won't back down)
I definitely didn't manage a thousand words yesterday. Everything I wrote today will probably have to be scrapped, because it's utter shit. None of it really works for the stories they're in.

For now, though, they're words. I guess that's what matters.

Work was long. My right heel continues to hurt. I bought some insoles for shoes, the kind that can be moved from shoe to shoe. Now it hurts like stepping on a nail, instead of before it hurt like stepping on a hot nail. I'm hoping that a few days of wearing the insoles will help... or at least ease the pain enough to be to tolerable levels. Though I guess saying that my heel hurts is a bit of a misnomer: it's more the area between the arch of my foot at the hell, sort of where the heel curves up into the arch? That's the part that hurts. And I'm pretty sure I did it on my feet at Mirko so much.

It actually doesn't hurt too bad when I wear my old Skechers, but I can't wear those to work, sadly enough. I can't wear any kind of trainers to work, because they don't look professional. I have other Skechers with memory foam and all, but none of them are broken in to the point that my old trainers are. In other worse, the other shoes might help the heel a wee bit... but at the expense of the rest of my foot: one is too loose at the heel and gives me blisters, the Mary Janes have a strap that constantly rubs blisters, etc.

I have a sneaking suspicion that I should be trying to find a good pair of Clarks to wear to work. I have a few currently on their web site that I don't dislike... but I'm not sure if I like either.

And anyway, that's all I've got for today. Good night, all.

Failed

Tuesday, 23 May 2017 11:16 pm
apollymi: Trunks staring off in the middle distance, no text (DBZ**Trunks: Sentinel)
I failed at going to bed before 11:30. Hell, I failed going to sleep last night before midnight. One freaking thirty in the morning was when I finally dragged myself to bed last night. I got on a roll. I think I'm almost done with this particular section (and that will have my "mirrors" prompt done), but I'm not sure yet. I did manage my best writing day ever, though: 5,285 words.

Today is not going nearly as well: I haven't even broken a thousand words. I'm going to keep trying, but I don't really think it's going to happen, sadly enough. But I'm a stubborn cuss, and I'm going to keep trying.

I keep thinking that I need to start posting this over on [community profile] 15kinks and [community profile] eternal_sailorm, but I have yet to arse enough willingness to do so just yet. I mean, I'm like months behind again on updating websites. I hate being so tired when I get off work that I just don't want to do anything but sit and write. Nonetheless... That's what I end up doing.

And yeah, I'm out of things to say here. Later, all.

Intentions

Monday, 22 May 2017 10:58 pm
apollymi: Jensen playing with the homemade monsters,  text reads "I am sane-ish" (Losers**Jensen: Sane-ish)
Today I fully intend to be in bed by 11:30. We'll see if that actually ends up happening or not, but that's my intention.

I am in the middle of writing my "Mirrors" prompt for [community profile] 15kinks (since I already finished "Possessiveness" and [personal profile] katsuko has already finished "Rimming"), and the words don't want to stop coming.

Anyway, I'm going to see how many more words I can get by 11:30 (or 11:45) and then I'm off to bed.

G'night, all.

An hour ago

Sunday, 21 May 2017 11:23 pm
apollymi: Chococat sitting in an orange chair, no text (Sanrio**Chococat: This is my ROOM!)
I meant to be in bed an hour ago. We've got a six a.m. day tomorrow, so the sooner we're in bed, the more sleep we'll have.

But the [community profile] 15kinks story took over my brain, and I've slammed out about 2900 words for the "Possessiveness" prompt, plus another 300 of the modern day alternate universe and 200 of editing on various other parts of the main verse. I'm not sure if the story is itself actually completed, though.

So... yeah...

Long day was long

Saturday, 20 May 2017 10:51 pm
apollymi: Chaucer looking annoyed, text reads "I will eviscerate you in fiction" (AKT**Chaucer: Eviscerate you in fiction)
So the porn scene [personal profile] katsuko and I were working on ate away at our respective brains. I ended up being up until 2 this morning working on it. I intended to catch a quick nap until I had to be up by 5 for the TOEFL test I was administering, but Roo decided I needed to wake up around 3 or 3:30 to acknowledge him.

Honestly, I ended up sitting at the end of the bed crying because he keeps doing this and it makes sleep so difficult. [personal profile] katsuko evicted him, and I moved to my bedroom couch and got a little sleep.

The test itself was... all right. We had one no show and two people who showed up with invalid IDs.

After the test, I caught the train to North Springs, let [personal profile] katsuko pick me up, we had some dinner, and then we came home and we both passed the fuck out. We got home around 2:30 or so, and neither of us woke up until after 5:30. I could still drop off where I'm sitting.

That said, I think I'm going to go ahead and crash. Sleep is sounding o damn fantastic, after all.

Kinkster

Friday, 19 May 2017 11:10 pm
apollymi: Close ups of Arthur and Eames, no text (Incep**Eames/Arthur: Perchance to dream)
So, yeah, apparently this story is going to be super kinky, even if we never hit all the things these characters think about doing to and with each other.

Let's just say that [community profile] 15kinks might end up being like double that in length... and that's just the canon era, not counting if we decide to do the modern au also. With Faraday's fantasies alone...

Anyway, Mum texted me to say that she doesn't want me on the road with the bad weather this weekend, so I'll be going down next weekend when it's supposed to be pretty.

I do still have to administer a test tomorrow, but after that, I've got a free weekend. I will try to not go see Guardians of the Galaxy, Volume 2 again. Who knows though?

Anyway... bed now. Morning comes really early after all.

Sleepy and kinky

Thursday, 18 May 2017 10:12 pm
apollymi: Usagi, wide eyed and excited, text reads "boy porn!1!" (BSSM**Usagi: Boy porn!1!)
Oh gods, you guys, this story...

So [personal profile] katsuko and I signed up for [community profile] 15kinks because of this story. We are actually doing a version of kink_meme for Goodnight/Faraday (GoodDay). I went ahead and set up an organizational post for it, because this is going to be hella fun.

Honestly, what is it with these two that lets me write shit that's a lot more hardcore than I usually do? I can't even write blowjobs when it comes to Vasquez/Faraday. But Faraday/Goodnight? Faraday has described, in loving detail, some of the stuff he wants to do to Goodnight, up to and including bondage, marking, edging, dominance, and manhandling. For Faraday/Goodnight, I've written a rather decently thorough blowjob, complete with a failed attempt at deep throating and a little breathplay.

Yeah, I got nothing for why I can write this sort of thing for one pairing but not others.

But it's also late, so I'm going to try to finish up as much of this scene as I can.

Later, all.

Something quick

Wednesday, 17 May 2017 10:47 pm
apollymi: Drawing of cross-looking chick, holding a teabag. Text reads "No tea No work" (Stock: No tea = no work)
We've managed to wrangle that scene and get it moving a bit, so this is going to be a very quick journal entry while we try to get a bit further into this. It's been fighting us, so I feel like we need to take advantage of it actually flowing for once and get more of the words out.

Of course, that might have something to do with the fact that I followed some links on my Reading Page and found [community profile] 15kinks. It definitely... inspired. Yeah, inspired. We'll go with that one. It inspired enough to make us consider asking for a card.

But yeah, that's about all I've got.

Falling asleep

Tuesday, 16 May 2017 10:32 pm
apollymi: Faraday and Vasquez fighting back to back, no text (Mag7**Vasquez/Faraday: Shootout)
I keep almost falling asleep on the keyboard. That's actually a bit embarrassing. It's probably a sign that I should be heading on to bed, but I want to finish up more of the scene that [personal profile] katsuko and I have been working on for the last couple of days now. Yeah, the less than happy but somewhat canon compliant Goodnight/Faraday... though in both of the cases where we've written it, it's been Faraday/Goodnight. I'm not too sure what to do with that.

Yeah, I haven't got too much awake left in me, so I'm going to try to get a bit more done on this scene then go collapse.

Plan?
Plan.

Joint

Monday, 15 May 2017 09:18 pm
apollymi: Ryou holding Thief King Bakura, text reads "Our Farewell" (YGO**Bakura/Ryou: Our Farewell)
[personal profile] katsuko and I are working on one of the joint sections of the GoodDay semi-canon compliant story. It's... not happy, but it's better than some of the shit they're getting into elsewhere in the story. I kinda want to shake them and explain to them that kink? It needs to be negotiated a bit first. At least the kind of kink they're getting into: breath play, rough sex, under-negotiated on pretty much everything... At least they're doing that negotiating in the parts I'm writing, even if it is a bit after the fact.

We've both said it a time or two, but if this were a modern!AU of this, it would probably involve a dungeon, a Christian Grey-style former dom, and Faraday trying to hire a hitman to take out said Christian Grey-style former dom. (I've found amusement in thinking of Faraday calling his bestie, Vasquez, to see if he can't hire Vasquez's cousin Carlos to come snipe the son of a bitch... because throwing in random The Losers references is a lot of fun.)

But enough about kinky shit. Work was work today. It happened. I did manage to get my four keys that opened almost no doors traded in for one key that will open everything I need it to. That's a good thing, because this weekend I have my first Saturday test to proctor, which will be an interesting thing, I guess. But I did need to have a way to get all the doors open for it, obviously.

Also, I've received my first jury summons in decades, for July 6 this year. I have to call the courthouse on July 5 after work (after 5:00) to be sure they still want me to come in. Sounds like quite a PITA, if you ask me.

So tired

Sunday, 14 May 2017 11:26 pm
apollymi: Ryou holding Thief King Bakura, text reads "Our Farewell" (YGO**Bakura/Ryou: Our Farewell)
I wonder if this is the subject line I've used the most on this journal. Probably so.

Either way I'm trying like hell to keep my eyes open long enough to get this entry typed up, so that I can go the fuck to bed. Because I'm tired enough to say shit like 'go the fuck to bed' at this point in the day. Yeesh.

All I did today was write. I did talk to Mum on the phone a bit, which was really nice, but that was about all I did. Most of what I worked on today was the semi-canon compliant GoodDay story. Seriously, I'm going to have the ending written before we get through the beginning... except that I'm not sure I'm actually working on the ending; I think it's possible I'm working on something a little bit more towards the middle. It's not going to end as quickly or as neatly as we originally intended for them.

That said... I think it's time for me to go the fuck to bed. Goodnight, all.

Something quick

Saturday, 13 May 2017 10:22 pm
apollymi: Bakura and Kaiba fanart, black & purple background, text reads "We'll make something out of nothing" (YGO**Bakura/Kaiba: Something out of not)
Well, we did the meal with [personal profile] desolate03. It was rather short and all the way down on the side of town where I work, but the food was good and filling. It was a good visit all in all, if short as ever.

And then [personal profile] katsuko and I ended up talking ourselves into writing a semi-canon compliant Faraday/Goodnight fic... and it's approximately 88% hate sex and bad BDSM etiquette. But amusingly, we're both working on that other 12% right now. She's working on the almost sweet sex at the beginning, and I'm working on the post-Battle of Rose Creek set up they need to be having. It's going to be fucking glorious and painful and a train wreck. I'm looking forward to it.

But other than that, it's been a fairly quiet day. We watched a movie at home, I forgot about making dinner until nearly 9:30 at night, and Roo chewed his way into a bag of Doritos. That's been the most noteworthy things of the day.

And on that note, I'm going to back to that 12% of GoodDay happiness. Later, all.

sorta blah

Friday, 12 May 2017 11:18 pm
apollymi: Ginji in taro/chibi mode with teary eyes (GB**Ginji: *wibble eyes*)
Okay, I'm sorta blah today, and I guess that's sort of expected. It was a long day at work, in which I tried to get writing done, but nothing was willing to cooperate.

I mean, I did manage a few words on Wicked Ones, in the "The Mine" section, but that's it so far. I'm not even sure I've hit 1000 words for the day.

I just can't seem to get my head in the game once I'm at home in order to make the words happen. Usually that's because I'm too tired when I get home to do much of anything.

Maybe once I'm adjusted to New Job, I'll be able to get more done in the evenings. Right now, my body is still slowly adjusting from the craziness of the restaurant to the steady hours of higher education. Once that's done, maybe -- maybe! -- I'll be back to writing more full-time.

Or maybe I'm just burning out. We've been writing pretty much nonstop since November. Or maybe I'm just at difficult sections of all the stories, and trying to make words happen on difficult parts is... well... difficult.

Or maybe it's some combination of some or all of the above.

Pepper

Thursday, 11 May 2017 10:01 pm
apollymi: The Labyrinth goblins staring out of dark background, text reads "The goblins are out to get you" (Labyrinth**Goblins: Out to get you!)
Right now I have enough Dr Pepper in me to fuel a trip to Mars. I didn't want to fall asleep at the keyboard again today like I did yesterday, even though I'm running on even less sleep today than yesterday.

Just one more work day this week, and then I have a couple of days off. [personal profile] desolate03 is back in town, so I know that [personal profile] katsuko and I will be having dinner with her on Saturday, though if my paycheck doesn't get here soon, it's going to be an awfully slim dinner... like Taco Bell or something. Nothing wrong with that, mind you, because Taco Bell is what we tend to eat when we're short on cash anyway, but it seems pretty bad to do that when she's only in town a couple of times a year. Maybe it'll be here by tomorrow. I can hope anyway, because I also need to pay the Verizon bill Saturday as well.

The checks are mailed from Alpharetta, so you would think that would mean they would be arriving here soon. I was actually kind of hoping for it to arrive early, in fact. I guess that was hoping for too much, though.

And yeah, that's about all I've got for today. I call myself trying to make words happen on Wicked Ones, but it's fighting me. I got a lovely long, long review for it, and I feel like I need to update it now after that. I've got Chapter 18 finished, but I want more of 19 completed before I post it.

So, I admit to defeat. I'm gonna go do the sleep thing. G'night, all.

Awake

Wednesday, 10 May 2017 09:45 pm
apollymi: Cup of coffee, pen, and written on paper, text reads "Writer" (My Writing: Writer)
I'm not sure I'm actually awake typing this. I feel more asleep than awake.

Which means tomorrow is absolutely going to suck. It's going to fucking suck out loud. Because tomorrow is my morning to open at New Job. To learn how to open, I guess is the better way to put that.

At least I got to pick the morning I was going to train. I picked tomorrow because [personal profile] katsuko has to be at IKEA at 6:00 a.m. Getting to pick the day I'm training does help.

But either way it's going to suck because it's so early.

But it's so that I know what I'm doing when I have to go in on the 20th from 7:00 until 12:30 in order to administer the TOEFL test.

But I'm still just trying my best to keep my eyes open. At least until I finish typing up what I handwrote and then go to bed. I'm gonna go do that now.

Tired

Tuesday, 9 May 2017 10:06 pm
apollymi: Duo, Usagi, and Heero with grunge border, text reads "OT3" (OT3: Duo/Usagi/Heero (grunge))
[personal profile] katsuko and I went back to see Guardians of the Galaxy, Volume 2 today. It was every bit as good the second time around.

Tomorrow at New Job is my new employee orientation. Because I'm on my third week, and I'm just now getting my orientation in. Of course, Anastasia has been there two weeks longer than me and is just now getting her orientation in too.

Anyway, I'm falling asleep where I sit, so I'm going to finish this up. I still need to type up what I wrote at work today. I keep thinking that, if I get a nap, I'll be good to go to knock this bit of copying over, but I know how I am after a nap: I'm tired, grouchy, and lethargic; I'll be even less enthused about getting this done than I already am.

But I also keep falling asleep where I sit, so I'm going to get this done and go the fuck to bed. Later, all.

Early but

Monday, 8 May 2017 10:28 pm
apollymi: Steve & Danny hugging, text reads "Stop breaking my fucking heart" (H50**Steve/Danny: Stop breaking my ❤)
It's like super early for going to bed, but I'm so freaking tired that bed is not far away. I'm not sure that I'm going to hit 1000 words today, even with the words I have handwritten, but I guess that might be okay. It's not a hill I want to die on today, if nothing else. So I'm going to type this up, type up what I handwrote at work today, and then go the fuck to bed.

I'm a little frustrated with all the things I'm working on, actually. I have a list of complaints, even. Wicked Ones was easier to work on before the characters made up and started getting along. Damning the Devil is at a full stop, to the point it's being plundered for ideas for other stories. Memento Mori is fighting me hard, but it's not ready for a scene change yet. Lev7 is pretty much at a standstill, because while we might have the entire first job mostly sketched out, it's very rough and I'm not sure how to get from where we are to where we need to be. Monstrous: After Midnight is fighting me, in part because the bits I'm working on are the final battle, and I blow at fight scenes, I really do. Resurrectionist is giving me relationship fits, because I actually have developed so much love for the Goody/Faraday pairing at the beginning that I'm sorta "meh" on it ever turning OT4 at the end... though the threesome that will end up ensuing later on still makes my fucking day so much.

And even though I'm the one proposing a "Aces High" challenge -- a writing challenge to come up with Mag7 fanfic where at least one of the characters is asexual -- I have no ideas whatsoever on it. I'm not even working with [personal profile] katsuko on the one she's writing.

I feel like I'm being left in the dust by everyone. I kinda hate it. At the same time, though, yeah, why not. I'm no good as a Mag7 author without [personal profile] katsuko. No one reads my YGO stuff. My crossovers are a joke. And my actual novels? Clearly worthless, given the stellar lack of sales. Why am I fucking bothering? Why do I even try, you know?

What gets comments? The stories or sections of stories that [personal profile] katsuko writes. What gets kudos? The two stories that I just consulted on. What gets the most love? The story that I've barely written on and more or less just maintain the website.

Why do I bother trying to write. Why do I bother, period, full stop.

A quick thing

Sunday, 7 May 2017 10:11 pm
apollymi: Yuya counting on abacus, Kyo sleeping next to her, colored pink, no text (SDK**Kyo/Yuya: These soft moments)
I'm going to try to get this done very quickly, because I'm trying to make words happen. They're not cooperating, but I'm still trying.

Things I need to be working on:
***Wicked Ones - Chapter Nineteen - Section One - "The Mine"
***Wicked Ones - Chapter Nineteen - Section Three - "Wild Jack"
*Wicked Ones - Chapter Twenty - anything
**Memento Mori - Chapter One - Section Four - "Miss Emma"
***Monstrous: After Midnight - "Luck and Bullets"
*Monstrous: After Midnight - "Wendigo"
*Monstrous: After Midnight - "Gatling"
**Resurrectionist - "Chapter: Outbreak" - "New Orleans"
*Resurrectionist - "Chapter: Resurrectionist" - "After First Love" (Working Title)
*Resurrectionist - "Chapter: Infection" - "Bite"
*Leverage/Mag7 Crossover - "The First Job" - "Closer to a team"
*Leverage/Mag7 Crossover - "The Meet-Up Job" - "Call Your Sister"
*Leverage/Mag7 Crossover - "Side Jobs" - "5 + 1: Dealing with Archie"
*Leverage/Mag7 Crossover - "Side Jobs" - "Laid Up"

Top priorities are the ones with three stars. Things I'm most likely to be working on are two stars. But all of them are things I need to be working on.

So, yeah, there is a that.